Panic-Working
Even though I have been regularly working at home for nearly four years, working from home, 100% of the time, has brought about new challenges. Yes, there's the new normal of Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday labeled under their new moniker, "Day." And there's the blur of meal times and finding comfort in favorite childhood meals (hello, PBJ) and cookies (Girl Scouts, you rock). But the strangest feeling I've gotten out of WFH is panic-working.
I am working near-constantly on projects to put in the extra effort.
I am volunteering for more work to show up as "hyper-present" on lots of Zoom calls.
I am spending as much time on emails and video calls on the weekends as the weekdays.
I am continually seeking to add value to areas beyond or not even related to my current role.
I am coaching, working, parenting, partnering 99% of the time, and taking care of myself 1%.
Sound familiar? It's a natural feeling. Freud described this panic-working phenomenon as an exaggerated manifestation of what drives us to work in the first place: our fear of mortality.
How do we define ourselves if not by how we contribute to the world, i.e., what we do to stay busy? And in today's time, how we show up on social media. i.e., showing that we are so busy.
By working all the time - in a traditional world or the one we are living in now - you are not giving yourself the time or space to breathe. When you focus solely on your to-do list, you don't think about your to-care list.
Over the past few weeks, I've discovered that my identity is tied strongly to my work. What I do, how many clients I have, what's keeping me busy. Panic-working is a behavior I usually have, but being at home with a focus on business building has only heightened it. Making a dent in the world is a personal goal for long-term legacy. But there's so much tied to that, that panic-working hinders.
I practice cultivating life-enhancing change with my clients. It's time to listen to my advice. Here are the steps that I'm taking to rediscover my identity that includes a balance of work blended with rewarding-to-me moments.
Nightly walks with my family. At 5 pm, I shut down my computer and go downstairs to take a 30-40 minute neighborhood walk with my guys. It resets the tone for the evening to be happy and joyful. I'm in a better mood for the rest of the night, and nothing else matters in this treasured time.
Fitness. Has anyone else been watching Cheer for inspiration? Just me? Okay. Kidding aside, I take great solace in working out. But, I have let weeks go by (i.e., panic-working) without doing any focused physical activity. Whether it's a leisurely 11-minute mile run or a Tabata ride with Robyn on the Peloton, I'm committing to four quality workouts per week, starting today.
Diving into Alison Roman's beloved recipes. I feel like I'm pretty late to the Roman train, but with "The Cookie" getting over 5,000 five star reviews on NYT Cooking, I'm going to listen to the people and make a batch this weekend, along with "The Pasta" and "The Stew."
Jewelry-making. Working with your hands is therapeutic, and the rhythm of doing something over and over is calming. I ordered brightly colored beads off of Amazon and planned to make adult friendship bracelets and send them to my friends. Getting something unexpected in the mail is a bonus these days. Plus, these bracelets are plastic and easily washable/sanitizable.
What are your rewarding-to-me moments? And how are you reimagining your work schedule to incorporate more of them?